How do we know to say the right thing at the right time and under the right circumstances?

How not to say the wrong thing

It works in all kinds of crises – medical, legal, even existential. It’s the ‘Ring Theory’ of kvetching(To complain persistently and whiningly). The first rule is comfort in, dump out.

LA Times Op-Ed, “How Not to Say the Wrong Thing.”  Quote from this website and article…

Susan Silk and Barry Goldman

April 7, 2013
When Susan had breast cancer, we heard a lot of lame remarks, but our favorite came from one of Susan’s colleagues. She wanted, she needed, to visit Susan after the surgery, but Susan didn’t feel like having visitors, and she said so. Her colleague’s response? “This isn’t just about you.”

“It’s not?” Susan wondered. “My breast cancer is not about me? It’s about you?”

We often think about how to say the right thing to folks who are recovering from a medical procedure and/or live with a mental health issue like PTSD.  But more often than not we wonder if we really did say the right thing after we say it…  There are lots of tips on this subject to sort out, but why not think of it in the context of the Ring Theory’ of kvetching” illustrated above and in the LA Times Op-Ed, “How Not to Say the Wrong Thing.”

Steve Sparks
Author
Reconciliation: A Son’s Story

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